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Describe how the goals we choose are related to the emotions we feel. Offer personal illustrations.
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when we feel negative emotions, we internally make a goal to figure out a way not to feel like that again.
like feeling like I was alone and unlovable as a child because everyone left. which in turn developed a goal that I needed to constantly get affirmation that I was loved or good enough or never I wasn’t, but I would keep my walls up and keep everyone at a distance so that It won’t hurt when they left me, or betrayed me cause my belief was that everyone would. -
My goal was driven by emotional feelings of inadequacy. I needed to prove my intelligence through attaining a degree in order to facilitate a state of stable foolishness and therefore prove my worth and ability to contribute to my family and to the world. My desire for God first and above everything else was corrupted when my father told me as a child that I was stupid and unintelligent.
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In foolishness, we choose goals that alleviate or create new emotions and feelings of satisfaction. Often, I’ll get behind on tasks and become very anxious about them. They may not even be a high priority but I’ll stop what’s necessary to alleviate the feeling of having too much to do.
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Setting a goal is risky to some people, and there are those who won’t make the commitment. A goal means some action will be attached to it, whether identified specifically or not. When the goal to start this course was put into place, I felt excitement and anticipation to learn how to “help” others. After learning that I can’t and shouldn’t fix others, and what the goal of SoulCare is, I’m now a bit apprehensive. This emotion is part of a confidence issue as well as a learning curve. I’m certain that the first time I point someone to a deeper relationship with God, my emotion will be gratitude.
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One of the goals in life I have had was to be very, very good at something, to be an expert. I wanted to be an expert in music. My strategy to that was to become a conductor and a pianist, and a successful concert become my singular joy in life. But after I got my Masters, it occured to me that I was not as talented as I thought I was and I had a temperament that was not suited to becoming a professional conductor. This self-awareness of the limitations of my own talents, led to great disappointment in myself. I ended up as a High School music teacher, and I conducted the school band, but at time I really feel the regret of what could have been. Sometimes I feel regret for having chosen music for my career, and sometimes I regret not pushing myself harder professionally and ‘settling’ to become a music teacher.