Of the three basic “don’ts” of SoulCare taught in this lesson, which one do you most often do? Why do you tend to do this? Of the three basic “do’s,” which one do you tend not to do, and why?

[Austin]

Stop to reflect for directee being curious instead of ‘fixing

[Austin]

Fix them too quickly… not listening long enough

[Austin]

Don’t.

Most often it’s offering advice or possibilities. I feel like if I have nothing to offer, then I’m not being a good friend and come off as if I’m not really listening.

Do.

I think the hardest is to just think reflectively. I do tend todo this, but not in depth, until after the conversation has been had.

[Austin]

I often start with advice because it is easy to believe that unless I give good advice and solutions, that the time is being wasted. I’ve learned how important listening is and the value of understanding the ware on the hearts of others.

I think I reflectively think less. Quiet space is awkward and there feels like a pressure to be helpful and carry on the conversation. This can sometimes lead the conversation to be less organic though.

[Austin]

I’m great at giving advice (something I am now trying to stop since I started this course). I think I do this for a few reasons. I don’t see the logic in people’s self-destructive behaviour or when it hurts other people. I understand that everyone can make their own choices, but it’s frustrating (that other piece of junk inside me), that they would do something which will obviously cause ultimate harm of any sort.

So very self-righteous of me. Another piece of junk I’ve asked God to work on.